donuts - i told you to get me donuts! ...

ok, every year, all of us cousins get together and do a santa gift exchange. we all bring a wrapped gift and put it on the table. we draw cards and either the high card or low card gets to pick first. this usually sets off the first round of the debate on the official rules. the rules are extremely complicated, and get debated vigorously each year. the only rule that everyone always agrees on, and is strictly enforced is the opposable thumb rule. if your thumbs touch the gift, it's yours.

anyways, the exchange is one of those one where you can either pick a unwrapped gift or steal someone else's. and the gifts are usually alcohol based. this year, there were three shooter snakes and ladders in the exchange. very odd.

now, i don't like to give just alcohol. i like to go for some kind of twist. this year, i am pretty damn proud of my idea. i decided to give a bob and doug gift basket.

beer - check
bacon - check
toque - check
dvd - check

but how do i wrap it?




quick! pit stop at tim horton's. wrap everything in donut containers!

put big donut box on the top.

as gift is being opened, "these can't really be donuts?"




oh yes, my friends they are.

cue cousins falling on floor laughing.

christmas is going to the dogs...

****update - i think i have solved the photo problem.*****

one of the things i like about the blogging world is that i'm constantly remembering things that i've forgotten.

like reading dale's post reminded me of a long conversation i had at work years ago. one of the nice things about working retail is you spend a lot more time talking to the people you work with. you really get to know them much more than in an office situation. dale reminded me of a long conversation i had once about how there needed to be more xylophones in rock music and that a tribute album really needed to be done. dale, i don't know what happened to my dream!

'goober' and my xmas ornaments are teaming up to kill me. here is my version of the events. just in case, something "happens" to me. last sunday, i am walking in my house. the path is clear. suddenly, 'goober' appears and pushes a box of ornaments in front of me. i trip. i am in pain. my ankle is killing me. i think nothing of it.

however, as the week progresses, my ankle still hurts. i take a look at it mid-week, and i can see it started to bruise. and on friday, it hurts so much, i decide to have a little soak in the bath and i see that my ankle is turning many colours. purple, brown, black, blue, yellow. bad 'goober! bad 'goober'!

today it seems to have stopped adding any additional colours. and the pain is beginning to subside.

i leave you with a series of photos. i think i will call it... 'goober' - a study in snow.

i'm drinkin' up christmas!...

****updated - for some reason i forgot to title this post.. corrected!****

first off, before i forget, here is possibly my favourite ever web search referral to my blog.

"how do you get a chicken out of a bottle without breaking the bottle or killing the chicken"

i've had a bunch of bizarre celebrity encounters recently. here are some of the highlights.

1. a band member from a certain band that i have made no attempt at hiding my hatred for. now, granted, i do know this person, but i haven't talked to them for years.
2. a singer whose cd i mentioned in my blog.
3. an artist whose work i love.

i mention this not to brag, but just to try and explain how weird my headspace is these days. nothing is surprising me anymore.

i am so happy to have my car back and running, i wanted to hug it this morning. is that wrong? now i just have to figure out where i put the thingy for my tape deck so that i can run my mp3 player thru it.

our favourite bad tempered zombie listed a few of xmas traditions that her family partakes in. as always, i am stealing her idea and posted a few of my own.

1. the traditional xmas music gift. formerly a cassette, and now a cd. the making of which is best accompanied by shortbread, chocolate, eggnog, and baileys

2. christmas eve must be spent at the railway club. and without planning, i must see my christmas friends there. it's weird if i don't, and it's even weirder when i see them in summertime. we all get very confused.

3. now, some of you may know i collect christmas music, but when it comes to decorating the tree, i prefer to do that to the sex pistols and sometimes smokey robinson. this comes because as a teenager, i bought both these albums and played them for the first time while decorating the tree by myself.

4. these decorations are among the first to go up on my tree. jack and zero go up near the top of the tree. usually near marilyn. lock, shock and barrel must always be separated. they get up to no good if they aren't. ernie and bert however must be very close to each other. and usually near the back for privacy.

5. we always have lemon meringue pie for dessert.


hope everyone is having a great weekend. i know i am!

bass! how low can you go? ...

today's random list is full of my fave countrified songs.

1. gift – sugar
2. bring the noise – the unholy trio (i can not get enough of this song). listen here.
   
3. poor little critter on the road – the knitters
4. count down our days – fembots
5. dick in dixie – hank III
6. everybody loves me but you – juliana hatfield
7. teach me to breathe – dave pirner
8. the good ones – the kills
9. take my money and run – cuff the duke
10. it begins – girls against boys

have a good weekend y'all!

another one rides the bus...

i think december will be mainly a month of postings of random things. i will probably be working six days a week and some night shifts so i think that will work best.

first off, i found out what point 11 from my previous point meant. i called up my friend with low blood sugar and she said, what the girl meant was that people with low blood sugar get cold easily. there you go. you learn something new every day.

if i do change my blogger name to 'pancakes' then goober will become 'waffles'

and now random bus stories...

sometimes when i get on the bus, for fun i will sit next to the person who makes it most obvious that they do not want someone sitting next to them. is that mean?

on the skytrain the other day, a grumpy old man sat in front of me. he asked me if the umbrella next to him was mine and after i said no, he threw it. now maybe he meant to throw it down, but he ended up throwing it across and nearly hit the woman sitting there. he didn't even apologize, just kept grumbling to himself.

today, i got to see this totally old couple in their 70's, sitting on the bus, holding hands and flirting with each other.

while waiting for my bus, i watched this incredibly beautiful girl flirt with this totally nerdy geek. and she was really flirting big time. hair tossing, smiling, moving in close.

then when the bus did come, our bus driver harassed all of us about our transfers. look, i know this is a weird route, where the zones combine and you can actually go two zones on a one zone. but we didn't make the route! nor assign you to it! so deal. and don't try and make me pay extra you bastard!

yippee! it's friday tomorrow! and i got my car back today! whoooo hoooooo!

cold as ice...

ok, confession time. i stopped watching 'the hour' two months ago. i always wondering what would make me stop watching it. i mean if brooke hogan didn't, what would? apparently the answer is three roman polanski jokes. i wasn't even sure i wanted to go to a taping. so how do i feel now? stay tuned.

but first...

randomness from two days of attending 'the hour' in vancouver.

1. yes, i went to the hour with mel. i don't know how this is possible but she is even nicer in person than online. sadly, i could not wear fancy boots. so i wore red and black starred creepers instead. also, when meeting someone for the first time, bring gifts. mel and i exchanged xmas cds. she also brought chocolate. there was no way i was not going to like her after that. (ps.. get a passport lady!)

2. i need to buy a clown mask. of course, it will have to live in the farthest corner of my basement.

3. the tim hortons on dunsmuir, near the railway club serves the coldest ice caps i have ever had. i felt like my whole esophagus was frozen. (i can not believe i spelled that right on the first try). oh, and cream cheese and ice caps are not a good taste sensation.

4. just when i think it is not possible to love rick mercer anymore, i learn something new and even better about him. and my heart grows like the grinch with more love for him.

5. i am a bigger techie geek than i thought i was. i spent most of the taping watching and listening to the production crew. on an additional note, i really miss using my slr. i feel like i've been cheating on it with my digital.

6. certain bc "stars" are even bigger assholes than i thought.

7. brett butt is really really funny.

8. i am obsessed with taking photos of pancakes.

9. certain people are freakishly smart. so much so i may have to change my blogger id. i am thinking of perhaps "pancakes".

10. do not listen to south park songs when listening to your ipod alone in crowded streets. because you will laugh out loud and everyone will know you are a freak

11. overheard in the lineup. "are you checking your coat?" "no, i have low blood sugar". what does this mean?

12. sweltering tv studio + downpouring rain + no umbrella + no hoodie = one potentially sick clown.

and now the answer... seeing the show live, especially on tuesday made me think i might just give it another shot and catch up on a few episodes that are on my pvr. especially because i think there's a steve earle interview in there somewhere.

happy hump day everyone!